February 6, 2012

Two cultures...

I'm a bitter, clinging, coastal urban sophisticate, and this made me laugh. It's so true.

Hillbuzz Conservative Politics, Analysis & Humor — Kevin DuJan Editor:

...The guy at the end who wants the duck replaced with "eggplant parmesan" reminds me of how frustrating it was to plan political events involving food back when I was a Democrat.  I hosted phone banks every night out of my apartment in Pittsburgh back in the 2004 Kerry campaign and I'd order pizza and soft drinks for the volunteers. I always had to spring for odd sizes of a half dozen different kinds of pizza — because this one person was a vegetarian and this other one couldn't have gluten and someone couldn't share slices from a normal pie and wanted his own personal pan pizza. It was ridiculous, since none of these people ever chipped in and just expected me to pay for everything since I allowed the campaign to use my apartment as a makeshift phone banking office in the evenings.

Now that I'm a Republican, it's completely different. If I have an event and order food, people either gratefully eat whatever's there without complaint or they don't eat if they don't like whatever it was. There's no "substitute eggplant parmesan for the duck and make sure the parmesan is really soy because I'm vegan and ask if the eggplant was cruelty-free and sustainably harvested because I only shop at Whole Foods and only eat vegetables and fruits that naturally of their own volition fell to the ground as Gaea commanded and were not picked by parasitic humans". Instead there's a pepperoni pizza, a Hawaiian, and a BBQ chicken one.  And if someone doesn't like that, there's a cell phone in his pocket for him to call Domino's for himself. People in Republican circles don't have an expectation that each event they go to was designed to cater explicitly to them the way Democrats do.

Oh, and Republicans always leave a few bucks hidden somewhere in the kitchen before they leave to chip in for the food they ate or pop they drank — though they never, ever will hand this to you directly, they'll always hide it so they don't embarrass you by trying to give you money (as if they'd imply they didn't think you could afford to spring for the spread). The only Democrats who would chip in and hide a five or ten somewhere were Hillary Democrats — the conservative Democrats that have been called Jacksonian, Clintonian, Reagan Democrats, and — according to Barack Obama — the "bitter, clinging, Midwesterners"....
Posted by John Weidner at February 6, 2012 10:22 AM
Weblog by John Weidner